Wednesday, April 24, 2013

The Urge to Purge


So I was looking through the Internets searching for some cheesecake recipes when I stumbled across a trailer for the movie Purge. Take a look at it.



Crazy, right? From what I gather, for one night out of the year, crime is perfectly legal. I plan on seeing this movie. But I don’t want to see this movie because of the plot or the actors, I want see this movie because of the implications of the policy of allowing crime for one night of the year. Could a society allow this to happen? How depraved does a society have to be to let people kill for one night a year? Is this a government thing (apparently so according to the movie)? What would other countries think about America instituting such a policy? I realize that the movie requires the suspension of disbelief, but it brought up this weird premise, and we must consider it.

Also, think about the people in this society. Their behavior has to change, right? They have to be nice and such for 364 days out of the year out of fear that if they did anything wrong, someone will put them on their “kill list.” Angered someone at work? You are going to be hunted. Accidentally insult someone? You might be hunted. Cut someone off on the highway? That person will follow you home, take note of your address, and hunt you down on crime-free night. It’s ridiculous. Crime may be at an all-time low because of fear of retribution. Unemployment is low because if you don’t hire someone, they will kill you. Or unemployment is low because there are tons of dead people which opens up the job market. This may be utopia, but it’s a utopia with a dark secret.

Other questions that pop up are how can you truly trust your friends? If all crime is legal, then you have to truly trust your friends in order to know they won’t try to kill or steal from you or rape you or do other horrible crimes. One final question is how are businesses still around? I hope the movie addresses what crimes are legal, but if all crime is truly legal, then that means robbery, embezzlement, and other white collar crimes can happen without consequence. If that’s the case, what’s to stop CEOs, business people, and normal citizens from stealing from companies and businesses? The movie argues that it is peoples’ natural tendency to commit crimes, but if that were the case, then shouldn't all companies fail. How can unemployment be low if companies cease to exist? I really want the movie to answer these questions, but I know that a two hour movie can only do so much. I plan on seeing it, and I hope it’s a great experience.

Still, one of the aspects of the movie is that cities shut down during “the purge.” This includes emergency services. However, I believe that during all of this Walmart is still open. 

Saturday, April 20, 2013

Strange Questions and Adequate Answers


So I figure with my many blog posts, you are probably wondering who is this dashing, young man that I have come to love. Well, allow me to answer your questions. Consider this an FAQ for my blog. Here are some questions that may allow you to understand the true essence of my being?

  1. How old are you? 20
  2. Who is/was your favorite comedian? George Carlin
  3. Who would win in a fight between Superman and Batman? Batman, hands down. Superman can get weakened by Kryptonite which would put him on Batman’s level.
  4. Have you ever killed someone? Nice try, chief of police.
  5. When can I get your new album? I haven’t released one yet. Why would you ask that?
  6. Are you crazy? Only a little.
  7. What is your favorite food? Paella and egg salad sandwiches.
  8. Can I have your autograph? If you see me, just ask for one.
  9. What is your Twitter handle? @agentniles
  10. What’s your favorite color? Red.
  11. What is your search engine of choice? Google
  12. Who was your favorite president? I am rather fond of Woodrow Wilson.
  13. Do you think anyone actually cares about these answers? Everyone cares. These answers are important because they allow society to function?
  14. How many licks does it take to get to the Tootsie roll center of a Tootsie roll pop? 226.
  15. Have you ever been in love? Yes. It was a pleasant feeling.
  16. Why would you stop at 16 questions? That’s a bit weird, isn't it? Absolutely.
Those are some answers to your questions. Do you have any more for me?


Thursday, April 11, 2013

Reasons Why I'm Banned from Disney World

We've all done some stupid things at amusement parks before, right? Here are a list of ten reasons why the owners of Disney World don't want me coming back.


  1. I tried to take over the castle and rule over the park with an iron fist. People had problems with this.
  2. Jasmine doesn’t like it when you hit on her repeatedly
  3. No one likes it when you get into drunken fist fights with Mickey
  4. Letting all the animals in the Animal Kingdom go free is a bad idea
  5. Surfing down Splash Mountain is frowned upon.
  6. Derailing the Epcot train is considered “bad”
  7. There are many issues with Mickey’s slave ownership of Pluto, but it was a bad idea to bring this up in a park full of children.
  8. Reprograming the “It’s a small world” ride to have all the puppets attack the visitors is a bit harsh
  9. Upon reflection, it was inappropriate to steal a Goofy costume and do mean things to Donald
  10. Turning Disney World into a real life West World may have caused a few inexcusable deaths.
So those are my reasons. Why have you been banned from a popular tourist destination?